True Qualities of Friendship

This post is dedicated to the ones that had stood by, provided that listening ear, the shoulder to cry on and hung in there through the tough times of my life. It is because of friends like you that moulded the person that I am and for that I am always thankful.

I cannot imagine where I would be today if not for a handful of close friends that had taught me the values of friendship.

It is only right for me to pen down these respected qualities that I value and love so much in the hope that one day, I may pay this forward and be that same pillar of strength for others as you were for me.

The Listening Ear

We should all know this: that listening, not talking, is how we show someone we really care. The true listener is able to understand, sympathize, share in the pain and let that person know that he or she is the most important person at that moment. Knowing that a friend is willing to stop everything just to listen to you goes a long way in showing how important that person is to you. The next time a friend is talking to you, try to focus your attention on everything he or she says and cut out all distractions.

Do not waste time thinking of how to respond, or to cut your friend off. Stop and truly listen.

Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends that listen to us are the ones that we move towards. When you are listening to someone completely and attentively, then will you understand the feeling of what is being conveyed. Not everything can be said in words. Sometimes the unspoken words are more important than what was spoken. You can and will only know this by truly listening.

Sometimes All We Need Is A Hug

Don't act like you're a human encyclopaedia. Yes you may have the perfect solution but do consider if that is what your friend really needs right now.  Be supportive, compassionate, sympathetic and most importantly be there when they need you most. Avoid solving the problem, but rather help them face it. Not everyone expects to be nagged at, put down or given a list of solutions when all they really need is a simple hug.

The world is often a cold and distant place. We build walls around us to keep others at bay. In the process we often lose what is most important. We get caught up in battles to survive. We forget that we need to do more than just exist. We need to live. This open and genuine gesture called a hug, can, if only for a moment, break down the walls that often separate us. A hug can momentarily bring two people back to the most basic reason for being. Never be afraid to give others a hug, it opens your heart and tells them that you really do care!

Don't Build Walls, Build Bridges

If you don’t let people in then you are essentially building a wall around yourself and closing yourself off to those who can help you. I have found that it is so much easier to let people in and open up to them because it helps you build deeper and more meaningful connections with them.  I’m not saying we should spill our whole life story to someone on the first meeting, but we should share ourselves with people who seem trustworthy and real.

These few are the ones worth taking the risk for. All people share similar dreams and wants. We all want to be happy, successful, and well liked. Likewise, we also share similar insecurities and struggles. Everyone has their own insecurities and instead of covering them up, we should work on overcoming them. We should all become a bridge for each other to overcome our obstacles together.

Radiate and Share Positive Energy

Negativity is extremely contagious and life is way too short to be surrounded by it. We all know of that one person who constantly complains, judges and sees the bad side of things. This is the person who constantly sees the glass half empty, not half full. These people are unhappy, and feel the need to drag everyone down with them. Drama seems to surround these people simply because they create it, no matter how many times they insist they hate drama.

Misery loves company. So, please don’t be that friend. Stay positive and surround yourself with positive, happy people and then you will attract those types of people to develop friendships with.

Don't be too Quick to Judge

Who would ever want all of their friends to have exactly the same personalities, interests, and values? I personally love the fact that I have friends from all over the world, who have all lived completely different lives and have drastically different stories to tell.

All of my friends are unique in their own way, which is what makes each friendship a little bit different. Respect originality and search for it. We shouldn’t judge our friends for the mistakes they make, or for making different life choices than we would make. Loving friends means allowing them to be themselves and not making them feel bad about being who they are.

Reach Out and Stay In Touch

It is certainly a lot easier to keep in touch with friends these days, thanks to the wonders of social networking. However, I do feel that we tend to lose that "personal touch" with our gadgets and apps.

Try this: if you feel a sudden urge to talk to a friend you haven’t seen in a while, stop what you are doing, pick up the phone and get in touch that friend.

Think about it; is it better to text "I miss you" or to say it to that someone in person? End of the day, nothing beats the feeling of hearing someone say to you that he or she cares enough about you to pick up the phone and call. I have many friends that I keep in touch via social networking apps but the greatest friendships are with those that take the effort to meet up and spend quality time together!  

Cliché as this may sound, I'd like to end this post by saying to those reading this, "Thank you for being my friend!"