10 Truths You Will Learn Before You Find Happiness

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”   

-Mahatma Gandhi

We are all beautiful human beings here in this world trying to find our way.  Every day we seek to better understand the meaning of our lives.  We long to discover our gifts and release them fully into the world, and we hope to find happiness and peace along the way.  For some of us the key to these desires rings loud and clear, driving what we do and how we do it.  For others, these deep seeded needs are buried below the noise of daily life, below ego, below fear, below the pressures and norms that we face in society.

Having spent most of my life in search of the elusive "Happiness", it took me a great deal of time to realize that happiness was something we needed to discover internally. It is neither from someone nor somewhere else. It is deeply seeded in the very fabric of our existence. Somewhat of a mindset from the rationalization of certain truths that we must begin to understand in order to be truly happy.

1.  It’s impossible for anyone else to define YOU.

You are indefinable.  You are the only one in this world who gets to say who you are.  Circumstances and the opinions of others can only define you if you allow them to.  Do not give away your power and the magic of your essence by putting weight on negative situations in your life or the negative words of other people.

2.  You were born with everything you need.

For crying out loud, there is nothing that you are missing! There is no need to frantically become obsessed with the idealism of change.  You are whole and complete; and were gifted every talent and insight you needed to thrive in this world in the moment you were born.  Your only job is to accept this truth and then allow it to unfold.  Some gifts don’t become apparent until later in life.  Some insights only become clear to you once you have life experiences that unlock such wisdom from within you.  Trust in this and relax.

 

3.  Perfection is a man-made illusion.

We are beautifully imperfect beings, operating in a very imperfect world, and that is just the way it is meant to be.  Striving for perfection is a hollow goal, one that can never be achieved.  Society shows us doctored images of perfection constantly in marketing, media, opinions and expectations.  Do not buy into this illusion; it will only lead you into darkness.  Embrace your quirks, your flaws and the fact that life is a roller coaster at times.  Strive for excellence, have high standards, but never confuse that with the crippling behavior of perfectionism.

4.  Creating positive energy.

You experience and create all kinds of different energies that affect how you feel and what you accomplish throughout your day. Some energies are powerful and easily recognizable, while others are more subtle and often only intuitively felt. I believe it is fair to say that everything is, in a sense, energy. The things you say, the things you think, the things you do. Even the things you don't do, all produce energy that impacts you and the people around you. If you work on creating more positive energy, you’ll see improvements in your life and you’ll touch more lives than you ever thought possible.

5.  Your beliefs can be modified to lift you up.

Whatever you believe to be true about yourself and life in the long-term becomes your reality.  Your beliefs are ingrained patterns of thinking that you build up over a lifetime.  They are habitual ways of processing the world around you.  If those beliefs don’t work in your favor, you can change them.  How?  In the very same way the negative beliefs formed in the first place – via repetitive thoughts that you accepted to be the truth.  Ingrain new beliefs by consciously choosing and repeating messages that lift you up.

6. Let go of the past, live for the moment.

Now is the moment.  The past is just a memory.  The future is a mental projection.  You can choose to dwell back in the past for learning and joyous reflection.  You can choose to dwell in the future for visualization and practical planning.  However, any time your awareness floats away to the past or future frequently for negative purposes, you are suffocating your ability to thrive in the only moment you ever have, NOW.  Past and future literally do not exist right now – feel the freedom in this truth.

7.  Fully express who you already are.

Don't waste your time being someone else you're not. All too often, I see people idolizing and wishing they were someone famous like Li Ka Shing or Warren Buffet. Will you truly be happy if you had their same problems and stress? The world will never see another human being like you.  There is no one on the face of the planet that has what you have.  Your uniqueness, in every respect, is your gift.  Life asks one thing of you, to be the full expression of yourself so that you can leave your unique imprint on all those you encounter and upon the world.  Never underestimate the power of your energy and how it ripples outwards to affect everything and everyone around you – IF you are being your full, authentic self.  Honor your intuition and act upon all your inspirations.

8.  Challenges are gifts for your growth.

Without challenges you cannot unlock your full potential.  Obstacles are opportunities for growth.  The world needs the fullness of who you are, and it is through your experiences in life that you unfold into that fullness.  How can you demonstrate willpower and strength if your resolve has never been tested?  How can you role model love and compassion if you have never faced hate or deceit?  Knowing there is a higher purpose within dark times, is what leads you to be at peace in the midst of those storms, knowing that you are a diamond being forged under pressure.

9.  Forgiveness is choosing happiness over hurt.

We do not forgive others in order to free them of the situation, burden, guilt or regret.  We forgive others to free ourselves and walk into compassion and love by doing so.  It is in freeing ourselves that our energy level rises, our consciousness rises, and in doing so those around us benefit too.  The words of forgiveness have a positive impact on those we forgive, but ultimately forgiveness is a choice that allows us to be happy again.  This goes for both forgiveness of others and forgiveness of self.

10.  Surrender is the essence of a happy life.

Letting go is not giving up.  Letting go is surrendering any obsessive attachment to particular people, outcomes and situations.  Surrender means showing up every day in your life with the intention to be your best self, and to do the best you know how, without expecting life to go a certain way.  Have goals, have dreams, aspire and take purposeful action, but detach from what life must look like. The energy of someone aspiring to create their dreams, teamed with surrender, is far more powerful and creative than someone determined to create outcomes with a desperate ‘must have’ mentality.  Surrender brings inner peace and joy, and lest we forget that our outer lives are a reflection of our inner state of being. 

Inspired by: Bernadette Logue, author and Peak Performance Coach of Pinch Me Living